My new trick

I've been trained to throw the ball to Shiner instead of eating it myself, now I just have to convince him that he wants to play with me.

Sensitivity (Dog) Training

Listen up, and listen good....I've got a lesson for you all. This weekend I gained immense amounts of knowledge regarding equality, compassion, and human and animal rights. My parents, in their altruistic nature, have resolved to teach me how to be more accepting of people or animals that I may encounter who may be different from myself or those who I am used to.


I've been raised around an extremely macho, tough dog named Shiner. He is quickly becoming my BFF. We enjoy long walks around the neighborhood at night and sharing teething biscuits. I feel a connection with him that I have yet to feel with other animals. This is why my my Mom decided to use him in a "hands-on approach," to teaching me to be more accepting of others who may lead "alternative lifestyles", she felt it best that I learn these lessons from someone or something I loved and knew well.

So, its a typical Sunday afternoon romp on the floor...Shiner's chewing on a rubber bone which I believe is specifically made for super-powered dogs with brute strength and high testosterone levels. I am watching him waiting for an opportunity to pounce on him and grab his bone or his paws. Mom comes in and tells Shiner that she bought him some new tennis balls and that he'll no longer use his old green ones, but would now be using pink breast cancer balls instead.

Initially, he seemed confused and forlorn but I showed him that they were just as good as his green ones and he shouldn't be afraid to play with these.

Using my newly learned sensitive voice, I said:


"Now , listen here, Shiner. Using these balls does not make you less of a man...it just shows that you are secure in the dog that you are and, in turn, makes you seem even more manly for having the confidence to use pink balls when other dogs may not be. Not to mention, you are supporting a great cause and that is quite impressive in a K-9. Who knows, you could start a new revolution of charitable dogs. Just consider that this could be a huge turning point in your life and the lives of many others. By using these balls you are making a difference in the world"Shiner seemed receptive to this revelation and slowly perked up and began chewing the ball vigorously to show that he was proud of his new responsibilities as an advocate for dogs with alternative lifestyle choices everywhere. Here he is thanking me for putting things in perspective for him. I told him that I am glad to be of service...We soon were ready for the next step in our sensitivity training. Admittedly, I found this a a little disconcerting at first, but grew comfortable with it. I see nothing wrong with a dog who is so utterly comfortable in such a beautiful ensemble. Soon it seemed as though Shiner was really comfortable in his new skin. He was running (almost prancing) about trying to catch his new pink balls with reckless abandon. It feels good to have been a part of Shiner's emancipation from pre-conceived notions of what a male dog should be. He is so much freer and uninhibited now.


This experience has taught me to be more open-minded and less judgmental, which I firmly believe is a lesson better learned early than never. Mom says I'll encounter people the rest of my life who are different from the "norm," but I shouldn't treat them any differently, just like I did with Shiner on that special day. Now, if I could just get some of these hard-headed adults to do the same!






**No dogs were harmed, physically or emotionally, in the making of this blog. Shiner has resumed his normal activities and continues to thrive as a masculine male dog, pink balls and all.

Bluebonnets are Barfy

Imagine a peaceful, serene Sunday afternoon with a full belly after a big meal of Turkey, vegetables, and Barley (oh yum) and as many Cheerios as I could shove in my mouth. I'm snoozing in my Mom's arms, dreaming of turning stereo knobs, frolicking in the meadow with my Aunt Nessa, and splashing unabashedly in the dog's water bowl, when I hear a fuzzy conversation and my Mom saying to someone "Ok, we'll be there in a minute."

All of a sudden, my onesie is being ripped off of my still limp body and Mom says something about 'not being able to wear that dirty old thing for pictures'. I scream with dismay over such an abrupt awakening. How dare she? Its not like I've ever deprived her of her rest before!

Mom quickly changes me into my hip and trendy velour jogging suit and we hop into the car. She sits with me in the backseat, presumably to allow me to give her dirty looks and make her feel like she's a strange, alien-like being the entire ride to wherever it is we're going. She kept trying to make me laugh with her out of control noises and movements, but I was still holding a grudge. I refuse to give in that easily, so I just looked away and shunned her. Its going to take some seriously funny gyrations or possibly the use of her cell phone for my teething pleasure to mend what she's broken just now.

We drove for quite some time, just enough time for me to fall back into my previously interrupted slumber....until I was again awoken by Mom putting on my shoes and unbuckling me from the carseat. Has she no shame? You would think that she had some personal vendetta against me, like she was getting back at me for some similar instance of interrupted sleep she may have herself endured. I mean, I used to wake her up at least every 3 hours for the first few months I was alive, sometimes even every hour on the hour, but she liked it! She would get this glazed over look in her eyes when I woke her , I assume from the excitement she felt in hearing my sweet cries once again.

Anways, back to the topic at hand...

We get out of the car and I look around to discover that I got woken up to stand on the side of the highway in the middle of the country with some blue flowers all over the side of a tiny hill. I was appalled and immediately disgusted, not to mention bored already. My 2nd Mom was there with a huge camera too, and asked Daddy to set me in the middle of the blue flowers!

I was not happy about this, these flowers provided me no satisfaction whatsoever. Why was I placed here?

Dad tried to bribe me to cheer up. He promised he would give me as many teething biscuits and Cheerios as I wanted once Mom was at work on Monday....

This just wasn't enough for me, although I attempted to lessen the scowl on my face for Dad's sake, I wouldn't mind a little uninhibited snack time tomorrow. I just couldn't fathom why I was positioned in a field of flowers that could potentially cause me allergies and provide me no apparent benefit. The adults continued to make annoying noises and call my name incessantly for what seemed like hours, it was exhausting.

From what I gather, this is some Texan Rite of passage that all Texan children are forced into at a young age, and therefore become accustomed to it as they age. As you can see, Abby seems to be enjoying herself and her pretty smile seems to turn on almost robotically as soon as she steps into the flowers.

Even Caleb is falling for this...

Eventually I gave into the crowd of my friends and parents doing every silly thing imaginable to coax me out of my doldrums, and leaked out a smile, I suppose it was sort of fun.


I wonder if this is just a Texan thing or if babies in other states are subjected to similar situations?

Freedom of Screech!

To the lady at Target who gave my Mommy a dirty look when I was telling her what I thought of the nailpolish color she was about to buy...you are mean! And same goes to you, family at Applebee's, who looked annoyed by my one-sided discussion of current events with my mom and dad over dinner. I am discovering a new side of myself. A freer, more chatty baby lives inside of me and wants to get out. It may sound shrill and ear-piercing to you, but it is my current method of communication.

Is it not my right as a citizen of the United States, Under the first amendment of our great constitution that our country's forefathers created, to have the freedom to screech whenever and wherever I choose?


I'll have you know that I am a close, personal friend of our wonderful Governor Rick Perry-he even sent me a personal welcome into the world, which not many other babies can say (although now that I look back at my welcome card it seems suspiciously similar to a form letter). I could have you banished from this terrific state of ours for your unlawful disregard for my freedoms!

I hope all of my fellow screeching babies will join me in my crusade to rid the world of mean-spirited people who can't enjoy the beauty of our voices!

Why is he shaking his bootie?

Excuse me? I resemble that remark!!!


This is what my cousin Josh said when Mommy sent Aunt Wonderful (this is what my Mom's sister requires that I call her-not quite sure what wonder means yet, but she's definitely full of something) a video of me crawling. Now, I realize that my diaper may make my derriere look a little voluptuous, but I was so obviously not dancing in that video....I was CRAWLING!!!!


You heard right, I'm a crawler now. Hard to believe I was an entirely stationary object just a few months ago...and now I'm on the loose! There's no stopping me! I've been eyeing things around this place from afar for MONTHS! Finally, I am able to check them all out close-up.


The parents weren't prepared for this, I keep hearing them say this over and over....Didn't they know that this is just a natural progression? Geez. You'd think Mom never read any baby books or studied baby milestones obsessively. They knew it was coming and have had 9 months (technically 18 months) to prepare and they still weren't ready.


I started out last week with this funny half-crawl. I'd leave one leg crossed in front and pull with it while I pushed with the other behind me. This gave Mom and Dad a false sense of security that they would have more time to relax before I was quick enough to get away from them and research my newfound treasures unsupervised. Not so! I just wanted to watch their faces when I went from a snail's pace to figuring it all out in a heartbeat. I rushed off towards my bedroom, leaving a trail of dust behind me along with my bewildered parents....only the dog can keep up.



My favorite thing to do is to turn this huge knob on this big, black box below the even bigger picture screen on a stand. If I'm fast enough, I can get over there and turn it before Mom has a clue I've even moved. Its so loud that she makes a funny face and covers the protrusions that stick out from either side of her head. She says "No, no Cooper," which I'm pretty sure translates to "keep up the good work, kid" and moves me back to my toys (boring!). Like stacking plastic squares and putting oddly shaped objects into a box is any match for my intellect and skill! I need real action, like eating Mom's shoes, I've figured that if I hide under something, it gives me more time to chew. Maybe she shouldn't leave them out?

GO ME!!! There's so much more to see and do now that I'm mobile! Here's an action shot:

Vote for Me!

My favorite, most talented photographer in the world has posted a contest on her blog. My picture is Picture 5, Please vote for me and have your friends vote for me! Maybe you'll be the one I give the extra session to.

http://shantellwyatt.blogspot.com/2008/04/my-first-contest.html

P.S. I've recently learned how to give hugs and kisses and vow to give you both if you'll vote for me.

Love,
Cooper (the chubby naked kid in Picture 5)

My updated Stats

Today was my big "9 month check-up", it was pretty much the same old thing. Mom and Dad strip me down naked, they set me on a scale, there's a big commotion about something and ounces....blah, blah, blah. You know the drill.
The differences this time were:
1) I was able to converse with the nurse and doctor. They were especially riveted by my new Native American chanting.
2) I only required one "vaccination," aka: horrible, painful, it-hurts-so-bad-I-can't-even-muster-a-cry-for-several-seconds stab in the leg.
3) I received a gift at the end of our meeting, which so flabbergasted me that I ceased my pained cries after my vaccination. Here is a photo of said gift:

A beautiful, red whale.

Which fits perfectly in my mouth.

To add to the joy of this visit, I am now 29.5 inches long which is taller than 95 percent of other kids my age, but I've slimmed down to a sleek and slender 19 lbs and 11 oz. The doctor says this is due to my new, intense daily workouts. Mommy says she plans to supplement my diet with fatty foods to make up for the lost calories so I don't lose my thunder thighs.